the story of sailor*, is the story of many - but also not exactly. this time it takes place in ljubljana, but it could be also somewhere else and sailor is also not sailing, to be precise. so what is it than about ?
* sailor is one person or two, sailor can be a community or the object you really like a lot, sailor's entity has multiple heads.
being a sailor is an identification game & not so much having a boat.
Sailor is feeling a little washed up. too many voyages too many anchors too many swashbuckling mornings spent trying to swab a deck that just gets immediately dirty again with expectations. Today Sailor is going to to climb to the highest point and take a nap. It will not be a forever nap but it will be long enough for a change of wind.
When Sailor takes a nap, they do so with their belly pointing towards the sun, or a star of their belly’s choice. Bellies are the best nap-navigators.
The belly-nap-navigator doesn’t just guide Sailor but the whole ship into the Dream. Before the Dream was in the Upper Left Hand Corner but things have changed now it is now hiding in a free mason building in the state of Saxony.
The thing about the dream and the ship is that Sailor is not just full of rum spinning a wheel around a list of mostly arbitrary directions. Sailor’s blood=pitch, heart=wood, brain=canned goods skin=a bunch of lazy pirates with tattoos that say things like ‘I <3 Mom’. This is to say that is not only Sailor an identity game but a Ship Game in which it is hard to draw a clear line between trustworthy sea vessel and weather beaten captain. Even more so in the dream of today which seems to overlap other oceans of previous work.
the dream of today which could be any day but is Wednesday:
Non-Euclidean Susan is in the Control Room. She is growing roots out of her hair that lead to many networks, many complicated filing systems. There are many dreams to be filed, many schizophrenias of ship/sailor/body/minds.
There are several magnets flying around. They demand a lot of respect. They speak in ‘either or’s. Some have red hair and microphones!
The Autistic Gentleman is also here. He is interpreting deep signals and writing these down in a special system that looks like code, ancient symbols, emojis, and very complicated pizza orders. He is also worried about the Dolphins. Sometimes he runs to hold an umbrella over their heads because maybe the magnets or the radio waves will upset them. He is also worried that the Dolphins are Dalmatians, but this is a technicolor-technicality of dream language.
Susan translates the signals into many languages: semaphore, boredom, a peculiar arrangement of chairs. Sailor only speaks a little of this language, but sometimes they understand things like:
To dissever the interface from the body, pleasure in separation, in vertigo.
Be very careful with plus or minus. Be very careful not to sacrifice the imaginary for diving lessons.
If you begin at the beginning, endeavor to repeat the entire conversation.
Sailor has a feeling that the distinction between systems isn't very important but it's more important how they make friends with each other because it is nice to have a friend esp. in a dream. Sailor feels like they wouldn't know how to separate things if they tried for instance it would be very hard to reduce the dream to a talker/robot and a dancer/unicorn and also why bother.
But somehow the dream is not satisfied with itself and needs a provocation, maybe from a new fleet of sailorbodyshipminds. After all the Dream has a belly of its own and is good at Navy Navel Gazing. Inside this funhouse mirror belly button is a loud and kind of RUDE sound which leads to a SLEEPY BURP which tends to scare the Best Dolphins away.
Maybe Sailor has another net another dream?
NOTE: thanks for staying tuned. it's been some time, but here we are again. Two installments of the log have been made while sailing slovenia. one with very official light at the Španski borci & the second one at cirkulatija². Footage has been sorted and arranged and more friends were made, texts and fragments have been rearranged and presented at home. archives have been digged. time became short once the space was more explored - some stuff didn t get finished and seems like sailor needs to sail again. For now most sailing is between kitchen and work, nevertheless a sailor does not sleep and with the invention of the ship, the ship wreck was invented too. so better see your self.
yours truly sailor
show must go on... on the 12th of october @ 11pm
there will be
a special broadcast from the radiostation in outa space - transmitted via ljubljanas very own Radio Študent
In today's _log Sailor is on a train and experiencing motion sickness. Too much time on the sea not enough time on fast land centipede legs. Hopefully Sailor doesn't spill their guts which is let's face it lots of liquids that shouldn't be there.
Ok. inside these guts here we go:
somewhere is a good place to start.
The question is: But where/how/why to find it?
One way is to build it. The other might be to dig it out of the ground. There might be a third way, but more on that later.
Sometimes Sailor begins with the body because they return to it. They see it as an archive, a thrilling map of known and unknown territories. Sailing here is not so much a game more an expedition, a salt-fresh way to capture a wave and then dust it off with tools used by goofy archaeologists who insist on wearing dopey linen shirts.
Sometimes Sailor begins with building a body outside of the body, a ship within a set of ships. aka Russian dolls that the archaeologists just can't get enough of. Sailor has a friend Sailor who once imagined many Sailors trapped throughout iterations of last saved documents. Sailor_log: 12:49 January 23. 2004 for instance is caught in a whirlpool of edits and re-edits, virtually unrecognisable now at 11:17 August 25. 2020. But updates do not MIX or SYNTHESIZE they just ADD TO NEW LAYER GROUP. Even if you merge down the history is there. U know?
The question Sailor asked to Sailor is: would you want to drown these files/dolls? could you do it? do wooden file faces look sad in Davy Jones's locker?
Sometimes Sailor begins with the body because Sailor is reduced to it. Sailor is after all an identity game but often this is a game of Solitaire.
The question is: How many different games are there in Solitaire? As asked on Quora by unknown.
B. Sandberg, the Author of BVS Solitaire Collection says :
If you mean the number of possible shuffles for one deck solitaire games then it is the astronomically large number. It equels to: 52!=52*51*50*...*3*2*1=80658175170943878571660636856403766975289505440883277824000000000000
When Sailor is reduced to Sailor’s body, they play an infinite game confined to not one outcome, but less than ten. Sailor can count to ten on Sailor's two hands, when Sailor is not busy cutting them off. Here is a short conversation between a possible set of ten freshly sawed off fingers and the number mentioned above, which Sailor will refer to by its nickname, 52!
10fing: we are an image getting close to death.
52!: It sucks that nobody really knows me but maybe one day I’ll find a cute script to hang out with… :) ?
10fing: they built empires off of us.
52!: hey hey, I know I’m big but like I exist within the known universe! I am finite! And fine!;*)
10 fing: Hands don’t regrow like heads. Empires fall apart on top of other empires. Mushrooms grow on both/all/either of us.
52!: I am a Virgo with Aquarius rising, moon in Cancer idk what that means but our synastry is lit! Actually I contain all possible permutations of astrological alignments several times over inside of me but lyk nbd can be whoever u want me to be.
10 fing: It’s harder to cut off the second one. you have to borrow a pair of feet.
52!: YOU KNOW, we are both base ten! I mean that’s one way to look at it!
10fing: *not listen* ( *is dead cut off fingers* )
52!: Ugh why do I always go for the ones who write codes that will determine the formation of centuries and seem virtually unassailable until some banal turning point that nobody could have predicted not even me. I mean like I literally contain multitudes.
10fing: There are no parts, only wholes.
52!: ughhhhhh. You’re so heavy-handed. (ba-dam-cha!)
The question is (and has been): who owns the files, and why are they so attractive?
Sailor’s answer to Sailor is: probably not Sailor. Or to be more precise: less than ten times out of a number so big and unknowable that it takes all the wind out of Sailor’s sails just to extend a little empathy to it.
Even so, this is not a reason to turn around for Sailor, but it is a reason to turn around the body, aka the beginning. To stay in the act of turning, to deny vectors the satisfaction of infinite space. Sailor’s space. They are so unused to being denied anything, just having one item removed from the (Menu (Dropdown) -> Preferences-> space-eating-capacity-set-to: not-infinite/) that they experience a terrible hunger. though it is very attractive, even shiny, sailor does not feed off of this hunger.
Good for you Sailor! You know that:
There are better things to eat, like dead fish files. Why not have a tea party with a russian_doll_mermaid_log, maybe in an .odt format in an octopus's garden?
(this is the third way)
. ... )<>
a studio is nice, having a space to work & experiment can be very useful, at times it can also be confusing or a burden.
Sailor is used to work without studio - a sailer is very mobil - so how to get back into the routine of making use of a studio?
building tools or instruments might be a good start.
the instruments were important as it was difficult to find a start. once the things were built it became possible to draw light with them and build imaginary landscapes and communicate them. to start is not necessary a direction - but its something to start from.
The instruments are simple or even primitive but somehow help to translate and perform basic emotions, movements and spaces - more like a catalyst- they start something and it makes it easier to perform and imagine sounds that come with them and add a body to the skeleton. The image is more and more close to death. various reasons that helped flooding the collective consciousness, until the point, that the image as information became numb and the eye blind. the image lost its body already a while ago. the bright screen of a mobil device can sing a song about it.
There is a radiostation somewhere in space - it nevery plays my song. Sailor is working there parttime, freelancer as a show host and radio moderator. trying to enter the eye via the ear.
it can be every day, it is not yesterday - it might be somewhere in today or maybe even only tomorrow. the day doesn't matter it's about the repetition.
searching for patterns and rhythms, creating maps of architecture and building own little architectures to map them. it slowly becomes a dance. working at the radiostation one has to make sure that there is no dead air. or there is dead air if we want dead air.
we still need:
- "on air" sign
- a ship (spaceship would work too)
- exact timecodes
**: Macedonia still sort of exists in the ways that one drink of alcohol in the morning doesn’t count or in the way that Sophie Call falls in love with the idea of being unanswered.
we met an angry and sort of rockstar looking Jesus. upset bc both of his hands have holes in them. Ok Jesus we get it you were the first pop icon wash me in the blood yada-yada p sure your last album dropped 2000 years ago but w/e.
a confession: I have a stowaway in my bag.
who is it? (you, punkrock Jesus, might ask.)
Lady Jane Grey the 9 day Queen of England
With or without head?
Oh, you might gasp. Or, you might sigh and say you knew it all along. This isn't to cater to your omniscient expectations, ok.
Both a headed and headless woman might seem like common place things but I am thinking of being blindfolded in luminous light. I am thinking of searching for the chopping block in the dark. ow? maybe. Here on the seven seas you just walk the plank off into the fish food void. More dissolving less top chef.
When Delaroche painted her maybe he thought of his semi-fresh headless queen. or maybe he was following in a long and cherished tradition of painting historical and soon to be dead women in order to show more tits
(we sailed to a park where all the statues are of men except for one it's of a girl. she is naked and nameless and grows on the 'wings of an inspiring thoguht' but more on that later.)
Question: what does it mean to cut off the literal head of state or more precisely why is power performed not only on the body but for the body.?
the body of state, the head of state, the hands running around everywhere doing the dirty work. Synecdoches for the parts we use on a daily basis to show expression. When was the last time you tried to smile with the back of your knee? To hail a cab with your kidney? be honest with urself.
Look we are in Slovenia and a smart guy is from here his name is Slavoj Žižek he got seasick leaned over the side of his ship and you know the drill. Another time he said this:
Fascism is fond of corporeal metaphors for labor and capital, like ‘head’ and ‘hand’; it likes to speak of society as an organism in which one social stratum is the head and another is the hand. Because fascism does not work and because the reason for its difficulties cannot lie in the antagonistic relations between head and hand, between capital and labor, the cause of the social disequilibrium is projected onto some cancerous formation, some external enemy.
When the Ceaușescus (romanian dictator + wife) fled Bucharest anarchy ensued. people were bleeding from the neckjoint all out into the street. The army knew there was only one way to staunch the flow and when they killed the Ceausescus together against a wall they did it on television, over and over again, for every single instance of the body of state to see. A body needs a head to keep itself together, but it doesnt matter if the head is a DEADhead or an ALIVEhead.
But not Sailor. Sailor only accessorises with such heads that might as well be mushrooms out here on open water which is fine bc something else to eat.
Over and out.
Strange shores today. Docked and met the letters
Mostly by accident. Sailing past the correct bridge and such. They were squatting at one of two last squats (not counting the dead and as recounted by Sailor) ž said that the infopunkt was a misunderstanding. š was v nice and told us about the history of his people and the reduction of language to symbols and vice versa.
It had once been a bike factory but now had two bike kitchens. š offered us some handbrake goulash a national delicacy but we refused on account of not wanting to lose momentum (+ had late breakfast.) With wind in our sails we attempted to enter the main building but were slowed down by a sudden gust of German skaters (Sailor pointed out on account of the tüten) and ultimately anchored by a large c.
Do not confuse c with c it is tempting but don’t do it.
There are many letters I consider friends and some pirates. Let us see we are still strange strangers we have good feelings tho and time will tell.
p.s. time is a mollusc of which there are many. It takes a dilligent Sailor to scrape them all off the sihip. Reporting to swashbuckling duties in the past and present.
Long ago on shipless ships and oceanless oceans
This is first SAIL to first THERE which is Ljubljana. Grey, dreary if we are talking about the weather (we are not) we are rearranging ourselves around a heavily breathing lady who never came back for her bag and the possibility of prolonged moisture.
Question: what is a future future and why is it here so soon.
The sandwiches are gone(typical.). Advised not to take a taxi. Wheel jam must role suitcase on side. Utility of this ship? hmm, need more algorithms to feed to captain aka SAILOR aka ME.
cumulative nostalgic status: Opi ist nach Slowenien umgezogen.
Will report later.
Ohright 1 more thing: Saw small fat kid y-day on Karl Marx with t shirt that said in underlined capital letters
sailor went to see the man.
sailor works in a studio now:
a flipchart is very important on a daily base & was found in the fundus.
|list of intreset||the score|
in addition s. also found a very professional mp3 player: the numark MP102.
- an hdmi cable as well, so the home studio is working. : ) obviously
especially in smaller communities it is vital to get to meet the punks & the anarchists. one might also gets to know them more. but it is usally the soul mirror of a community
- they might be filthy they might stink but don't underestimate their instinct.
later you will meet the mayor & the vice president in a cafe next to the town hall. THAN douple-check
in another conversation sailor talks about the slovanian masculinity
or let's call it yugoslavian masculinity. ?
Who owns the files & why are they attractive ?
it was described as a hybrid of german preciseness and working ethos maybe even something that is rooted in protestantism and/ plus the italian way to chill and relax in the sun.
(this mentality of man is called yugoslavian as sailer learned)
sailor doesn't know yet what to do with this information but wrote it down. more research will be nessecarry to maybe make use of it. Am man and his smell walks down the street with a nice handbag - one needs to study more,
it is very nice for sailor to have a studio now. somewhere.
and think about file formats & their erotic, mail art, masculinity, movement, the body & socialist architecture for recreation.
a map will be made & follow.
maybe he was up all night - sailor found him close to the train station, laying on the floor - very easy to overlook.